Beyond Multiple Orgasms - Learning Mega-Orgasmic Abundance - Advanced Sex Education

Huge waves of orgasmic pleasure flow through her body and burst out in thunderous exclamations. A second set of waves courses through her and crests for a long, long time. A third cycle billows forth, than more and more roaring surges follow. Like a tide of ecstatic blooming, she flowers open, further open, and even more open. Just when she thinks, "I can't come anymore," her lover urges her on and even bigger, more mind-boggling orgasmic tsunamis rush through her for what seems like an eternity.

Unbelievable Fantasy or...Reality?

It sounds pretty great, doesn't it? But is this just a lusty, wistful daydream? Perhaps it's another porn fantasy fake? Or maybe a trite romance novel's culmination? No, this is absolutely totally real. I know because it happens to me. Frequently. For me and other mega-orgasmic women, this is just a normal night of fabulous sex.

My Sexual Success Story

Please understand - it wasn't always like that for me. I didn't start out my sexual adventures having easy and assured orgasms or able to come like this. When I first had partner sex, I was pleased to just have one orgasm, and, like many women, even that wasn't a sure thing.

It took me a long time just to become orgasmically proficient and many more years to develop mega-orgasmic mastery. It was a slow and steady learning journey. The first step took over a decade before I learned how to always have an orgasm. In the following years I was delighted to discover the ability to have two, three or, on a really great night, four climaxes. At that point I thought I'd reached orgasmic nirvana. So, when I eventually developed the ability to have dozens of orgasms, or to be able to have ones that lasted for many minutes at a time, well, I was downright proud, pleased and inspired. Ecstatic, even! And my partners were pretty happy about it, too.

There are many reasons why I'm a sexuality teacher, but if I had to name just one, it would be this: I learned how to come like a banshee and I want everyone else, men as well as women, to be able to do the same. Learning orgasmic abundance has been great for my self-esteem and sexual confidence as well as a fabulous lubricant for my intimate relationships.

Practice Makes Purr-fect

If your orgasmic experience isn't all fireworks, don't worry - there's nothing wrong with you. Having easy-access orgasms is a learnable skill and it's one that you just haven't developed yet.

Notice I say that I learned how to do this. Have you ever thought about it that way? That you learn how to orgasm? Well, you do. In fact, much of your sexual response is learned. Once you understand this process, with diligent practice, over time you can learn how to get turned on and orgasmic from almost anything.

Sex School

You may believe such abilities are reserved for the lucky gifted few. I used to think that too, but now I know that most mega-orgasmic people weren't born that way. They learned to be able to come like they do.

Can you really train yourself to come whenever you want? Can you really have dozens of climaxes? Are you wondering, "How on earth could someone like me, do that?" Is orgasmic proficiency really something I could learn? The answer is an unequivocal "Yes!" I know because I learned how to become orgasmically abundant and I've taught many other people to do it, too.

This understanding forms one of the central tenets of the Wholistic Sexuality TM approach and is a component of many of my classes - our sexuality is a lifelong learning journey. Once you understand that you can teach yourself these inner skills and train your erotic responses, the door is open to conscious learning and the pleasures of orgasmic abundance.

You, too, can become an orgasmic virtuoso. Learning expanded sexual responsiveness is like learning to play an instrument or speak a foreign language. It takes time, practice, willingness and support to develop your orgasmic expertise and fulfill your wildest dreams of mega-orgasmic potential. And while it's true that you'll have to practice a lot (darn!), I promise you, all that hard work, dedication and training will be worth it! When you're awash in tsunamis of orgasmic ecstasy, you'll appreciate that all those hours of delicious practice were a fabulous way to spend your time.

Mastering your own sexuality is a wise investment in your sense of deep satisfaction and blissful well-being. Easy access orgasms are quite possibly addictive but they're zero calories, all natural and free! And trust me, there's nothing quite like abundant orgasms to keep you smiling, stress-free and radiating contentment. Remember, an orgasm a day keeps the doctor away. And, thirty or forty? Well, that just might make every little thing all right.

Sex Education - Top Three Sex Books of All Time

Throughout history, and especially today, sex has been a best selling subject, but it’s a fact that most of the best books to educate you in sex are hundreds or even thousands of years old!.

What then are the top three sex books of all time?

These are three that classics should be a part of everyone’s library.

The Kama Sutra

The date the Kama Sutra was written is shrouded in history, and is mentioned in other works as early as the 1st century AD.

It seems it was originally called Kama Shastram (science of desire), but later known as the Kama Sutra (discourses on desire), it is not just a sex manual, but a guide for any man’s life.

There are only 64 sexual positions mentioned in the text, and most would take some degree of sexual and physical skill to achieve, but some are easy and great for both partners in terms of pleasure and easy to do.

The rest of the work is mostly life advice, and strangely, a great deal of it is quite valid today.

Certainly a bit of it is still frowned upon, especially sections like the art of seduction of other men’s wives. Yet it is realistic and appropriate in the life of every man.

The modern translations are all, for the most part, well done.

The reading is interesting, and enlightening.

The book should be a part of every person’s library, as women can learn as much about sex and life from it as men can.

The Perfumed Garden

This timeless classic, written it seems in Tunis sometime in the 16th century (or 925 on the Moslem calendar) by one Sheikh Nefzaoui.

It is a sex manual, straight and certain, covering every aspect of a man and woman’s sexual life.

The information is very straightforward, and unlike all other Arab works, there are no commentaries on any of the sections.

This is obviously due to the subject matter.

However, the sexual positions are attainable, enjoyable, and reasons are often given as to why to do a specific position and not another .

The book even has a philosophical nature to it, as it studies the principles that determine the happiness of a man and a woman.

This by consideration of their mutual and basic relations which are dependent upon their character, their health, and so on.

This is a must read for every sexually active adult.

Memoirs of Jacques Casanova

Although most people in the world know the name of this famous Italian, very few indeed have read his entire memoirs.

The writings of Casanova run into about 4 volumes, and they say more by implication than description.

Actually, it is not a sex manual at all, and except for a very few incidences, Casanova does not go into very much detail about his sexual antics.

However, any man or women who consider themselves as sexual and erotic by nature should read these memoirs.

One finds his 167 conquests believable, as well as most of the amorous rendevouez described.

Jacques Casanova’s importance in terms of sexual importance is reflected in his surname which everyone knows what it means in terms of connotation even if they know nothing about him.

Many people neglect the above books as they feel they are to old and not relevant to becoming a more sexual and loving partner. Read them however and you will see how wrong they are!

Sex Education is Not a Sin

We can go to the dentist if we have an abysses tooth. We can go to the doctor if we have anything wrong with us. We can go to the gym and have a personal trainer work us out. Where can you go when your sex life is not working, to a sacred sex worker? I don't think so! Not for most of you anyway.

Educational books and DVD's are a good place to begin.

How about a board-certified sex therapist. They have their degree and training. They can explain about exercises to practice very much like reading a book, good information but it leaves something missing. And they are definitely a place to begin.

What about going to an educated spiritual sexuality practitioner or working with a sexual surrogate in conjunction with a sex therapist? It makes sense to you. Your marriage is on the rocks because your sex life no longer exists. You need help . You need to improve or learn new sexual skills. Your spouse is refusing to be intimate, sensual, sexual and is actually breaking their marriage vows but it is not seen in this manner. The partner that desires to have a love life is considered over sexed.

The sexless partner proclaims infidelity and grounds for divorce. That means by seeking professional help you are cheating on your marriage. It does not matter that the sexless partner is starving the other. Or that they no longer have a sex drive so their beloved should no longer desire to be sexual either.

Taking care of your sexual dysfunction is a very important problem to solve: For men premature ejaculation, retarded ejaculation, loss of sex drive, loss of an erection mid love making.

As a women are you non-orgasmic, never had an orgasm and don't know what the big deal is about? Or are you a women who loves sex and is desperately needing to be adorned and sexually appreciated and your partner is consumed in the garage with a dying libido.

Sexual abuse in a woman's history will reveal itself in a loss of sexual desire once the kids are born. Your wife won't talk about it, it was long ago. "I just don't enjoy sex any more" she says. So what are you to do as a man?

Let's say there is no problem but you know there is something missing. You know if you could just go back to school, in a manner of speaking, sex 101 for the mature audience.

* For instance, there are 5 different types of orgasms and 5 levels of orgasm men and women can experience.

*Men and Women can learn to breathe their body into a full orgasm, without genital focus lasting 5 -20-60 minutes.

*Men, you can learn to manage your sexual energy and control your ejaculative response experiencing multiple orgasms without ejaculating.

* Men, you could also learn how to bring your female partner to a full g-spot ejaculation, if you knew where her g-spot was.

* Women, you can learn how to bring your man to a full body orgastic state that leaves him shaking in ecstasy for 30 minutes after his ejaculation.

*Women, you can learn to play and have fun with oral sex, an intimate way of saying I love You.

Or you both can settle for the way it has been for the past so many years. Doing what you thought was normal, a few minutes of foreplay followed by 10 minutes of intercourse, ending with a 5 to 9 second ejaculation for the man and no orgasm for the woman. Gee, that sounds like fun, and definitely easier then rocking the proverbially boat.

Gosh forbid, men, if you lovingly challenge your wife. You may not get the little bit of sex you're getting now. After all you talked about it before to no avail. Why keep bringing it up? It just upsets her. Your needs are not as important as her lack of interest anyway. It is easier to be silent then truthful. The big question is when are you going to really do something about this broken situation?

Women, let's get honest about what is not working for us. Like almost everything, not enough intimacy, touching, talking, kissing or flowers. Definitely he is not a skilled lover, not the way he use to be. He cannot last more the 10 minutes and you are not even warmed up or he lasts too long and you just want him to get it over with. How could you teach each other what you need? No one taught you! Is it ok to ask for what you need and desire?

Would you like a willing partner who enjoys bringing you pleasure the way you need it not necessity the way you have been doing it. Remember It use to be good but all things need to evolve. Now it is just boring. The spice of life is missing. Women, how do you have an orgasm? Do you know how to ejaculate? Do you know where your G-spot/area is? No Why not?

Men, how long do you last and is it long enough for you and your partner? Do you have early ejaculation or Delayed? Have you lost your sex drive? Is it a Sin to even desire to Know? Education is not a Sin! Education means learning, practicing, improving, growing, changing and saving your relationship.

2004 All Rights Reserved Sexual Solutions LLC

Ina 'Laughing Winds" Mlekush M.A.M.F.C.C
Sex and Marriage/Relationship Counselor

-Sex Counselor - AASECT Certified
American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapist

-Marriage Counselor - MFCC
Marriage, Family, Child Counselor

-Chuluaqui Quodoushka Spiritual Sexuality
Senior Teacher

-Clinical Hypnotherapist

-Metaphysical Minister

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CONTACT Ina@SpiritualSexuality.com

Ina "Laughing Winds" Mlekush has been a Sex Educator since 1984 and workshop presenter of the Chuluaqui Quodoushka, Ancient Mayan, Toltec Spiritual Sexuality Teachings.

Ina has a private practice in Desert Hills, Arizona working with individuals and couples in traditional and non-traditional relationships. She does phone consultations and in office sessions.

Ina Laughing Winds takes great joy in teaching the Sacred Sexuality practices such as Fire Breath; a breathing techniques that brings an individual, man or woman to a full body orgasm.

Ina has over 24 years of experience in resolving sexual challenges:

Solutions for Men: Early Ejaculation, Delayed Ejaculation, Loss of Sex Drive, Erectile Dysfunction, Andropause Aging issues.

Solutions for Women: Orgasm Solutions, G-Spot Discovery, Female Ejaculation, Intimacy Needs, Self Loving, Menopause Aging Issues

Visit Ina's Smart Sex Store for hand picked Books with Ina's personal book reviews; CD's and DVD's You will find great Sex/Relationship Education from the best.

Old People Homes, Sex Education and Working Women Safety

Compare the social, developed or so called civilized animal (man) with the beasts of the jungle. You will surely find the beasts more civilized and peaceful than man. Cast a cursory glance at the inhuman acts of the man, its brutality, its barbarism and decide who is more civilized and social. Values of life of the modern, advanced and cultured man are evident that he is less than human and more than animal. If I am not at fault the animals would object on calling him just animal. What name can we give to him dragon, jinni, and savage, tarter, Berber, anaconda, or any other thing that is below the human dignity?

I am afraid I can not equate him with the animal community. All these communities have some passions and sympathies for their fellow creatures.

A few examples would prove the truth of my generalization. Old people's homes are a glaring example of this inhuman attitude. The people, who gave birth to us, pampered us brought us up and sacrificed all their wishes and emotions for us are sent to these human dens. Do they deserve this treatment? Old people homes are a blessing as the last resort for these hapless elders? What a strange invention of social animal!

Then there comes the issue of working women protection. The ladies who work hard and earn for the family are harassed and misbehaved by the social animal. They are teased and eyed as they are not women but a creature of the mars. Why?

Does monkey, lion, bear, bull, snakes or any other beasts treat their opposite sex in the same manner? No, not at all! The reason is that they are animals not men. They all respect their better halves.

The sex education for the students is stressed as it is a heavenly commandment. It needs not to explain that the sex education is any thing that should be thought in the class rooms. It is a natural phenomena and nature is its best teacher.

Then what should we say, to the modern man who is constantly finding a refuge in the strange ideas? I think that a new nomenclature is required for the man. The man who has made progress in all the fields of life has missed only the humane aspect of life. It is the need of the hour to say man something else. All the modern and progressive writers, thinkers and scholars should lay their heads together to rename him. May be it would change his "civilized" manners?

Sex Education Request For Toddlers - Let Our Babies Learn to Read and Write First

I have just read a story on sex education that I found quite disturbing. Not only am I shocked, I am fuming to say the least. How on earth are these so called bright sparks with their so called bright ideas permitted to lay down the law on what they believe is right for our children. There will be those opposed to my opinion on the matter, but as a mother I believe I have earned the right to say when "my" child is ready to be prepped on sex relations. I am all for the younger generation being made aware of the risks involved when having unprotected sex, but at an age appropriate that meets with their level of understanding. Below is a snippet that encouraged me as a parent to protest.

Mandatory sex and relationship education for children as young as four is needed to reduce the rising teenage STI and abortion rate, according to two leading sexual health charities.

These charities said children should be taught the names of body parts and about sex and relationships. So now we parents are compelled to confuse our toddlers, where the widgy now becomes a penis and the tuppence a vagina? Come on, "your avin a laugh ain`t yer." Four year old children need to have a life and not taught how to create one. Is curiosity not to blame for many an unwanted pregnancy? Give a child a gun they will use it - get my drift.

I am aware and fully understand the importance of this invaluable information on sex education, and believe that every child should be enlightened of the dangers, but only when the time is right. General education is of the most vital for our children to excel in life, but cramming too much knowledge into a tiny brain, can only but damage. Let us take one step at a time for Pete`s sake. Show me a 4 year old that can follow the instructions on a condom packet if not been taught how to read.

Another comment in favour of sex education for a 4 year old went onto say that young people will find information and if we don't give it to them in a responsible way, they'll find it from elsewhere. Of course they will like most other things in life. It is true we learn from others, but let those others be mom and dad. Parents know their own children best and therefore qualify to determine at what age their child will understand about sex relations. Children differ greatly in the department of learning. We we have those that pick up things more quickly than others. When I say pick up. I sure do not mean a contraceptive pill or a condom, more like their dolly and toy soldiers.

Ministers in Scotland and Wales say they have no plans to make sex relation lessons compulsory at the moment. Could these ministers have children? It's like the midwife who shouts at the breathless woman on the labour bed to cut out screaming while giving birth, only then do we find out she herself is childless (not all.) If these people care for the welfare of our children, then they should know innocent four year old toddlers wish not to think about "foreplay in the dark" but to "play in the park."

I am a strong believer in nipping something in the bud, but in this case please let our babies' have time to blossom.

Spiritual and Sexual Healing

Couple issues such as spirituality and sexuality rank higher than financial reasons as the most affected items of a fumbling relationship. When it comes the moment to point out why a couple needs more intimate vigor, two wrongly things are sure to happen: Women are always blamed, and if both recognize that it’s a male matter, also women blame themselves. Their consequent silent follows a behavior that will never end the cycle if there is no communication and willingness to solve it.

I agree on communicative practices within the pair for finding a reconstructive way, if that is what both desire. But I also propose to call upon the Angels of relationships to ask for help, guidance, assistance and healing in this realm.

It’s just a matter of concentrating in the voice within to open your self into greater receptivity to their assistance. Practice this for a few minutes daily as you release all your thoughts and feelings. Simply place the relationship in the hands of your Angels and let go.

With your trust in Angels, your beau is also being helped. Spirituality within a couple is all about the union of mind, body and soul. It’s the inner joy that reflects the pleasure of having one another.

After you have passed this first step through the pathways to achieve sexual healing, both must concentrate on “the” issue, the rebirth of sexuality life. Surely, answers on this matter lay on natural remedies: aphrodisiacs.

Herb properties influence people’s sexual attraction. However, few people know that herbs are stimulants. The Santoreggia, for example, is considered one of the most well-known aphrodisiacal herbs that turn on imagination, and reinforce and tone many nerves and muscles, increasing sexual interest. On the other hand, a person that feels unable to be sexual and spiritual at the same time is in urgent need of any presentation of Basil.

Knowing this, kitchens ratify their functions as the best allies of women in the solving of “the situation” by transforming themselves into nests of potions which stimulate and increase the art of love in those people who no longer posses enough erotic spur. Then, you may add five drops of Santoreggia essence on a sugar cube 4 or 5 times a day to stimulate relationships.

The correct use of nature's products, and especially the gastronomic patrimony combined with a pinch of magic ritual, is the right ingredient at the right time: On Friday nights, according to Wiccan tradition.

Some herbs that help sexuality within couples are:

St. John’s Wort

This herb is widely used to help lift a low mood and it is often suggested to boost a flagging sex drive in those feeling blue
Potency Wood
This herb is widely used by natives of the Amazon and Orinoco river basins to enhance sexual desire and combat impotence

Ginseng

This herb is often taken as a tonic for increased vitality and libido enhancement

Yohimbe

It helps to repair erection problems by increasing penile blood flow

Hops

If premature ejaculation or impotence is a concern, this herb can assist any neurosis that might be a factor in these dysfunctions manifesting

Maca

Peruvian doctors have been known to give this herb to male patients who complain of having erection difficulties

Cocoa

This food/herb is known as the 'pleasure herb'

Privet

The boiled extract of this herb can be used as a douche for vaginal irritations

False Unicorn

It generally promotes fertility in both males and females

It is necessary to fully understand their properties and their correct way of preparation in order to avoid distasteful results. It is therefore necessary to carefully examine the causes of sufferers of sexual problems in order to choose correctly.

And remember: Communicate with one another! Talk to have great sex!

Need of Sex Education in India

One of the much debated topics in India is 'Whether Sex Education is necessary in India?" The lack of awareness among the youngsters, particularly in the adolescent age group and their involvement in sex, rather in a primitive way is a worrying factor. They consider sex only as an act without any responsibility. It has spoiled many an individuals with early pregnancies, abortions, sexually transmitted diseases, aids, mental tensions, stress, torture, desertion from their families and loss of social respect etc. In the end, they miserably fail in their studies and become wayward in life.

One of the most acute problems that India facing or rather struggling with is the whopping number of AIDS patients.India has as many as 3,00,000 cases of patients suffering from 'AIDS' or tested positive for 'HIV'. Of them,considerable number of cases are in the age group of 20 to 30 years of age. This startling fact not only burdens us with the problem of redeeming them from the maladies of AIDS, but also entails us with additional problem of prevention of the dreaded disease from spreading to the other sections of the society. NALCO is doing yeoman's service in this regard.

Under the circumstances mentioned above, since prevention is better than cure, we have to launch our programs in the right direction, disseminating the knowledge about sex, the dreaded diseases like AIDS and their social impact etc. Another area that we need to concentrate is premarital sex .Though premarital sex is largely considered as a personal affair of the concerned individual, it is our duty to make them realize that premarital sex is not simply an act, but an act coupled with responsibility.

To drive home all the points mentioned above, it is necessary to introduce the sex education in India as early as possible, which is the second largest populous country in the world with a significant number of AIDS victims already.

Sex Education Can Be Easy

Sex education has never been an issue with my children. The most important thing you need to know is to look for the everyday opportunities that present themselves and act upon them.

I can remember once being in a car with one of my sons. He was only 8 years old at the time, but was sitting beside a lady friend of mine who was very large breasted. My son said to me, "hey mum, look at this", and opened his mouth like he was going to suck on the lady's breast (as he had seen me breast feed three babies by then). I was mortified and said to David, "that's not the right thing to do, David". I didn't say anything else at the time as it wasn't appropriate. Luckily my friend was very understanding about the incident.

Later on when we were at home I said to him, "so you noticed that my friend has large breasts?" I know that he was only 8 years old but he had noticed something and didn't need to be ignored. Admittedly he went about things the wrong way but he was only eight years old. So I took the opportunity to say to him, "David as you grow older you are going to notice that many of your girlfriends will start to grow breasts. It's just a normal part of growing up. And it is important for you to make sure that when talk to girls you look at their faces and not at their breasts". We had a great conversation and I didn't make a big deal of it. But I did answer all of his questions.

When my children were young I started their sex education by buying books for them. I found a great series of books for various age groups. When my kids were six I used the 6 to 8 year old book. I would read a chapter a night to them. It was a story book called "Where Do Babies Come From?" My kids would sit and listen to it as it was simply the routine they were in to at the time. As they got older we changed our tactics slightly.

Now, the books are in the book shelf for all to read whenever they so desire. I have made it a very natural thing for the kids to talk about sexual things and they feel comfortable asking questions. It is far better for you to answer your child's questions than to let them hear things from someone else, because that someone else will be their peers and peers don't always have the facts right. If you promote communication with your child they will come to you when they have questions.

Now my eldest son is sixteen and we have a great relationship. He can talk to me about absolutely anything and everything as I have paved the way for this to happen. If you want to have a great relationship with your child you must work hard to pave the way also which means making the most of every opportunity to communicate with your child about everything including sex. If you don't make it a taboo subject they will feel free to discuss things openly with you.

Three Sex Education Lessons From The Teen Pep Stories

One of the oft-repeated comments by characters in my novel, The Sex Ed Chronicles is that, in the absence of sex education, children learn about sex from their friends. However, the novel was based in 1980, before New Jersey high schools started to involve students in peer counseling.

On Valentines Day 2008, I read about a mini-controversy involving peer counseling on a New Jersey radio news Web site. The news coverage came out of one New Jersey high school: Clearview Regional High School in Harrison Township in the southern part of the state. There, parents object to peer counselors, high school juniors and seniors, counseling freshmen on a variety of topics related to sex education. The counseling model comes from a program called Teen Pep. Designed by the Princeton Center for Leadership Training (not affiliated with Princeton University), Teen Pep has been implemented in over 50 Garden State high schools for the past eight years. Therefore, Teen Pep is not a new program and school districts have had time to investigate its merits-only now, one school has made the news.

Teen Pep trains not only students, but also faculty advisors, to work one-to-one, but also as a team in various counseling situations. Schools contracting for Teen Pep work with the Princeton Center for a minimum of two years and there are supervisory field visits by qualified professionals to help ensure the program is running smoothly. A school that engages in Teen Pep makes a considerable intellectual investment, as well as a financial investment, to make it work. Part of this investment is to explain this program to parents.

Which takes me to lesson number one: if you are not ready to take these investments seriously, don't make them.

As I read about the incident at Clearview High, it became clear to me that the fault is not with the program, but with the school administration. It would have been easier for them to consult parents and clergy from the get-go, as they are supposed to do. I realize that teachers have objected to this-they did back in 1980 as well-but sex education is a subject where parents and clergy believe they have important opinions and knowledge.

I found it interesting to read that an advisory board would be formed after parents objected to individual aspects of the program. That should have been in place from day one.

Which takes me to lesson number two: after consulting parents, decide which topics students are qualified to discuss with peers.

Parental objections at Clearview stemmed from the idea that "kids were teaching kids to have sex. But there had to be clear differences between the topics teen peer counselors were allowed to teach, and those that had to be covered by a qualified sex education teacher-but they didn't make it in the press. Parents deserved to know, if they asked before school started. I realize that pro-abstinence organizations also use young speakers; their programs should be subject to the same parental review as the peer-counseling program.

Then I get to lesson number three: make sure you have qualified teachers.

The federal No Child Left Behind Act emphasizes a need for qualified teachers, meaning that a teacher should be certified in the subject they teach. That applies as much to sex education as any other subject. In the example of Clearview High, the program leader was an English teacher. When I reached family life education, I learned that sex education instructors were most likely to come from health education, home economics or social studies as well as nursing. I would also assume that guidance counselors could become qualified sex educators; they handle personal student issues as part of their job description.

It appears Teen Pep is working in most schools; only one school is in the news complaining, but those involved with this program should consider offering an alternative: to use degree candidates in counseling and education to counsel students.

This would not be peer counseling, but it would appease parents who worry about kids teaching kids about sex. It would also help provide professional development for sex educators.

The Parent's Responsibility in Sex Education

Parents ought to be the first source of sex education for their children. Don't think that because children can learn about human sexuality in school, your responsibility to teach them about sex has been removed. Especially now that there is confusion as to how to teach human sexuality in school, the parents must be ready to assume the role to educate their children in everything they need to know to understand their sexuality.

Who's better to teach about morality and the ramification of sex and sexuality to your children than you their parents? Often times, the school only teaches about the anatomy of human sexuality and the issue of morality and the taboos related to sex are often placed on the sidelines. This is where you should come in - teach your children their moral obligation when it comes to sex.

Sex education does not involve only teaching the children about the anatomy of the human reproductive organ. It's much more than that. Sex education also involves teaching the children their moral obligation towards the opposite sex. Even more so for teenagers, you need to teach them their moral obligation towards their boyfriends or their girlfriends for that matter.

More so if your teenagers are already sexually active. You have an obligation to open their eyes about the possible ramification of their action. Your son could get a girl pregnant or your daughter can become pregnant if they are practicing sex at a very young age. They should understand the implications of their actions.

Another very important aspect of sex education you should teach your children is the issue on sexually transmitted diseases. If they are already sexually active, they must understand that they can contract disease by sleeping around with many partners, or even from their very first sexual encounter

Sex education is always a difficult topic to discuss with your children at home. But this is yet another role of parents that they cannot escape from.

Sex Education and No Child Left Behind

Since The Sex Ed Chronicles is fiction based around sex education politics in the past, I was compelled to look at how No Child Left Behind affects sex education in the present.

The most obvious impact is that there is less time to teach sex education; emphasis on language arts and mathematics skills and tests has taken class time from all other subjects. I imagine there is less time for sex education taught in public schools in 2007, just as there is less time for recess. We need more of both in our schools.

When I researched sex education policy for The Sex Ed Chronicles, I read transcripts from state board of education hearings from 1980, the year that mandatory sex education, politically known as Family Life Education, passed in New Jersey, my home state. Those transcripts explained an overlap between sex education and health/physical education, home economics, biology and social studies. With less time available to teach these subjects, there is also a possibility that the units related to sex education get the short shrift. There is also a good chance that there is less oversight over sex education; politicians have a natural tendency to ignore policies that they cannot afford to enforce.

I cannot say that the legislative architects of No Child Left Behind saw a connection between their motives and cutting back on sex education. I have seen no evidence in the press and I was not around when the policies passed Congress. However, in states with abstinence-only or abstinence-until-marriage sex education policies, the public schools could technically out-source sex education to outside organizations, such as True Love Waits, or anti-choice groups—and comply with state education laws.

Outsourcing sex education in abstinence-only or abstinence-until-marriage states is not impossible for me to believe; community and faith-based groups receive more federal funds to promote abstinence-until-marriage than state governments by a ratio of approximately three to one. The school boards can hire outsiders to deliver their message and be compliant, without hiring certified sex educators, and they spend the money they would allocate for sex education towards something else.

This gives age-appropriate, medically accurate, sex education the short shrift. State governments, like New Jersey’s, that have adopted a more comprehensive approach to sex education, a more balanced approach (abstinence and contraception, for example), have been given the short shrift by the Bush Administration.

In New Jersey, Governor Jon Corzine refused to accept federal money for abstinence-until-marriage programs last November. Community and faith-based groups in New Jersey can still apply for federal funds through a different budget line to teach their message. Garden State residents, legislators, sex educators, parents and students, however, must pay more to get the sex education they want; they must fund the programs, pay the educators, and confront the competing words of the messengers who have been aided by our president.

That is sticking it up the buttocks, or whatever medically accurate name you prefer to call a backside. Not to mention the confusion it causes for parents who want their children to learn sex education in school.

While I would bet that conservatives would love to see all sex education confined to the outside instructors or home schooling, that is unrealistic. It denies parents and children the information they really need to know.

Sex Education And Children

The beginnings of sexual awareness

"Daddy, why is the sky blue?" "Mummy, where does the sun go at night?" And then suddenly, like a bolt from the blue - "Mummy, where do babies come from?" This question usually leaves parents squirming with embarrassment and trying to pass the buck to the other parent. Teaching children the facts of life, telling them about the birds and the bees, is something that most parents are not very comfortable with. Actually, this is a very narrow view of sex education. It is not just about having an embarrassing, private talk with your child or giving them a book or their being given a lecture in school complete with diagrams. Sex does not begin and end with intercourse. Intercourse could be said to be the most intimate way in which men and women relate to each other. However, it is merely one aspect of the relationship between men and women. In fact, children are learning about sexuality from the time they can spot the difference between boys and girls. They also get cues from the different ways in which parents relate to sons and daughters and the way in which parents interact with each other. Thus, children whose parents have a bad marriage will find it very difficult to contemplate that sexual intercourse is built on love and mutual respect.

"Where do babies come from?"

Parents can expect the 'dreaded' question about the origins of babies around the age of three. The question stems from natural curiosity. Parents should keep in mind that a three-year-old's level of understanding is quite simplistic. The child is too young to understand the concept of sexuality. The child will probably be satisfied if the mother says that the baby grows in a special place in her body called the uterus or womb and comes out after nine months. The next question is probably going to be - "How did the baby get in?" The only way a child is aware of about how things get in is through eating. Thus, a simple answer explaining that the baby grows from a tiny seed implanted in the uterus should suffice. If children want to know the father's role in the process, mothers can explain that the father put the seed inside the mother. As for how the babies get out, children can be told that once the baby has grown enough inside the mother it comes out from a special opening called the vagina. It may be a good idea to specify that this opening is different from those for urination and defecation.

Sex education is something that happens in stages. A three-year-old child might be satisfied when he is simply told that the father provides the seed that grows into a baby. However, by the time he is five, he might want to know how exactly it got there. Here again, parents should remember to keep it simple. After all, he is only five. Explain to him that the seed comes out of the father's penis and is deposited in the uterus where the baby will grow for the next nine months.

Some children don't bring up the topic at all. Parents of such children assume that their children are particularly innocent. But in all likelihood, parents of these children have made them feel, probably unintentionally, that the question of how babies are made is somehow taboo and not open to discussion. Such parents should keep their ears open for indirect questions, hints and jokes that indicate that the child is curious but afraid to ask a direct question. For instance, a little boy may constantly poke fun at his pregnant mother saying that she is fat or a little girl may ask her mother how their dog had puppies. Parents should realize that their children are diffident about asking them questions directly and seize these opportunities to explain a little bit about human reproduction.

Some parents prefer fiction to fact when discussing sex with their children. A common euphemism used by parents is that a stork or an angel brought the baby. Such stories tend to backfire because the child can see the evidence of the baby growing in his mother's stomach every day. The child immediately senses that his parents are being evasive about the issue and he is bound to find out the truth sooner or later. Parents are in danger of losing his trust because he is not sure when they might chose to lie or tell him half-truths again. In addition, the question of how babies are made acquires considerable significance highlighted by the parent's nervous and sheepish approach. He gets the message that the topic is something to be embarrassed about. Another outcome of this approach is that the child may hesitate to discuss things that bother him with his parents in the future because he is not sure of the response he will get.

Adolescents and sex

Parents who have passed the "where do babies come from?" stage usually heave a sigh of relief, thinking that's the end of that. But the topic of sex is bound to rear its head once again when their children hit puberty. This is the stage in life when girl's breasts begin to develop, their hips widen and they begin to menstruate. Boys see an increase in body hair, their voices crack, their penises and testicles grow and they begin to have nocturnal emissions or "wet dreams." Suddenly sons and daughters become impossible to cope with. They are constantly touchy and irritable, they seem to glory in being contrary and love playing the rebel. This is the stage when most parents wish their children were babies again.

Most adolescents become very conscious and sensitive about the way they look and the changes in their bodies. Parents need to help their children adjust to their sexually maturing and changing bodies. This is the stage in life when children need to be informed about sexuality, the sexual act and its consequences. Some teenagers may bring up the topic themselves directly or indirectly. Sometimes parents may have to take the initiative to broach the subject. If as a parent, one is diffident about discussing such a private topic with one's child, tell him or her the way you feel. This will serve to put both parent and child at ease.

Menstruation

Menstruation marks the onset of puberty in girls. Sometimes girls begin to menstruate before they have been told or are aware of what it means. One can only imagine how a young girl feels when she discovers that she is bleeding and has no idea what is happening. That is why it is essential that mothers discuss menstruation and its implications with their daughters around the time they expect the girls to begin menstruating. The tone that mothers take when talking about menstruation will affect their daughters' attitudes to it. Some mothers describe it as a curse; some mothers are embarrassed and use 'code words' to refer to it, others emphasize that this is a 'delicate' period for women. The fact is that menstruation is a normal bodily process and does not in any way prevent a woman from carrying on with her daily routine. While some women do experience cramps, a bloated feeling and tender breasts, these symptoms are rarely severe enough to bring life to a standstill. When a girl is on the threshold of womanhood she should not be feeling scared, embarrassed or resentful. Mothers should give their daughters the impression that menstruation is a rite of passage, a part of growing up and something to be looked forward to.

Nocturnal emissions

Once boys have reached the age of puberty, they begin to get erections and nocturnal emissions. It is important that they realize that this is perfectly normal and nothing to be ashamed of. Nocturnal emissions or "wet dreams" are the result of the ejaculation of semen during sleep often caused by a dream of a sexual nature. They may also have strong urges to masturbate. All this is perfectly natural. Parents should be careful that they do not give their sons or daughters the feeling that masturbation and erotic dreams are "dirty" or unnatural. The more matter-of-fact parents are about it, the more healthy their children's attitudes will be towards it.

It's not just physical

It is important that children are made to understand the emotional aspects of sex. Thus, while most schools usually organize a lecture on the topic, these talks tend to be quite clinical and impersonal and confine themselves to the physicality of sex. Teenagers need to understand that the decision to become sexually active should not be a casual one. A person's first sexual experience is an event of great personal significance and should happen when he or she is ready for it. Parents should explain to their children that they may be attracted to several people in their lives, some may be mere infatuations while others may develop into long-term relationships. Teenagers should realize that their bodies are their own to do with as they see fit, according to their desires and after exercising sound judgement. However, they should never have sex or engage in any other form of physical contact under pressure from another person, or to please someone else. There is a common misconception among parents that open communication about sexual feelings and the sexual act will have the effect of increasing the likelihood of young people becoming sexually active. On the contrary, parents who discuss sex openly, in a natural manner, are merely equipping their children with the requisite knowledge so that whenever they decide that they are ready to become sexually active, they will be making an informed decision and understand its consequences. Many children go through life with warped ideas about sex merely because their parents were too embarrassed to talk about it. Such children are left to gather information piecemeal from friends, books and the media and the conclusions they draw need not necessarily be the right ones.

How To Create An Almost Magical Loving Bond Between You And Your Child With Sex Education

How are your kids learning about sex?

Have you been dodging those probing questions in the hope that the school will teach your child about sex?

If you have, then you are not alone. A large portion of parents leave the sex education to the schools, because they find the subject uncomfortable and it is easier to say nothing than to say something.

But the truth is, to say nothing is to say a lot!

Whether you like it or not, you as the parent are the child's sex educator and they have been learning from you the day they were born.

The schools teach anatomy, contraception, sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy and there is so much more to sex education than that. The moral and emotional aspects of sex have to be addressed and this can only be done at home.

Most parents don't realize it but they are constantly teaching, not only by what they say, but how they act, say and do.

So when is the right time to have that birds and bees chat?

Never! Sex education for kids should start from when your child is born. So, by the time the schools get around to teaching the anatomy, your child should already be fully educated, with a large focus on the moral and emotional aspects.

Many studies in the past have confirmed that parents think they discuss sex much more with their kids, than the kids say they do. So forget about thinking that one talk about the birds and the bees is enough. Communication must be ongoing, but also consider what kind of an example you set with your own actions. Television viewing, reading habits, your talk about the opposite or same sex, your nakedness and privacy all add to the sex education of your child.

And remember we said that sex education starts from when the child is born? They observe your actions, they listen to your words and they form their own ideas. Begin your discussions early. If you haven't brought up sexuality subjects with your kids by the time they are 10 they will think they are taboo and shouldn't be discussed.

Take advantage of teachable moments like TV programs, billboards, pregnancy's, animal mating, etc. These are great opportunities not to be missed and never think your child is too young, just don't overload them with too much information. A simple, to the point, but honest answer will go a long way to answering their questions and correcting their ideas.

Be aware of the question behind the question. Often your child is asking "Am I normal?" They need reassuring that other kids ask the same question and they are in fact normal. Encourage them to ask more questions.

Children, between the ages of 8 and 12, worry about their development. Boys may worry about their penis size and girls their breast size. These worries mostly come from discussions at school and they will need reassuring from their parents. Children grow, mature and develop at wildly different rates.

And when those questions come, get emotional. Talk about the mechanics, but don't forget the unhealthy aspects, like unwanted pregnancies and disease. Children also need to know about the emotional aspects and what makes a health, caring relationship.

Sex education is so much more than talking about the nuts and bolts. It is about constant education while the child grows up. This will set up a strong moral framework that they can take into adulthood.

If you have been open and honest with your child's questions since the beginning, it will form that almost magical loving bond. It will encourage your child to come to you with any question in the future. The best place for your child to learn about relationships, love, commitment and respect is from you.

Why Sex Education Determines What Type Of Person Your Child Will Grow Up To Be

Being a Father to 2 boys, which are 13 and 10, I had always been a little bit nervous about telling my eldest boy about the facts of life. But once he got to high school and started asking questions, I knew I had probably left it too late. As he was growing up, the innocent questions tended to be skimmed around, as we always thought he was too young to know. But was he?

Sex education for children is important and needs to start with those innocent questions. Maybe not with much detail when they are 5 or 6, but certainly being truthful. As parents it is our responsibility to help our children to develop into well adjusted men and women. Here are some other reasons to properly and timely educate your child about sex:

• Sex education helps a child to wholesomely accept each part of their body and each phase of their growth. It enables them to discuss physical development without shame and embarrassment.

• Sex education helps a child to understand and be satisfied with their role in life. Boys grow to be men and fathers. Girls grow to be ladies and mothers.

• Sex education erases unhealthy curiosity. It takes away the mystery. Children who understand the facts and who know that their parents will truthfully discuss their questions have no cause for worry or concern. They tend to not be attracted to dirty stories and pornographic material. They immediately identify what is right and what is wrong.

• Sex education does not keep children from wanting to know, but it does eliminate the need for secretive investigations and unfortunate experiences.

• Wholesome information guards against serious complexes and maladjustments later on in life. It encourages a child to develop normal attitudes. Childhood misinterpretations and fears carry over into adulthood and often produce twisted, abnormal patterns in later life.

• Sex education helps a person spiritually. It clears their mind of distracting sex questions. It fosters a deep respect for human development.

• Sex education builds a child's confidence in their parents. If mothers and fathers are honest and helpful regarding matters of sex, children learn to also trust and confide in them about many other things.

• Sex education given at home in dignity and authority tends to overcome and nullify the unwholesome information that reaches boys and girls from outside sources.

• Sex education makes human reproduction clear and wholesome. A child should feel that having children is right. They need to know, as shown in Genesis 1:24, that God planned for each living creature to bring forth after its kind.

• Sex education provides a child with sound knowledge and good attitudes which pave the way for them to happily accept new brothers and sisters. New family members are not considered 'mysterious intruders.'

• Sex education, while making a child proud of their own sex, will help them appreciate the attributes and capacities of the opposite sex.

• Sex education removes many sources of fear. It assures a person of their own capabilities and normalcy.

• Sex education strengthens a person's self-confidence. It helps him feel comfortable and well poised around others. This is true regardless of a person's age.

• Sex education enables a young person reaching adulthood to make sound, mature decisions about girlfriends, boyfriends and marriage.

• Sex education lays the groundwork that helps to build a solid marriage. Young people who enter marriage with mature, wholesome attitudes and understanding are beginning on a sound premise.

• Sex education prepares a child to later become a parent who can, in turn, comfortably teach their own children. Most parents who find it difficult to discuss sex matters with their children tend to be raised in homes where there was little or no proper sex education.

So, is too much information dangerous?

No I don't believe so, I believe that lack of knowledge will lead to experimentation, as the 'thrill' of the unknown will be greater.

Why And How Parents Should Impart Their Children With The Right Kind Of Sex Education

Many parents are confused about what they should tell their children about sex and when and how this should happen. Parents are also concerned that sexual information might heighten children’s interest in experimentation, but many studies have shown that information and education do not encourage sexual activity. On the contrary, wellinformed children make better and informed decisions regarding their sexuality, when they feel that no subjects are considered taboo at home. Some parents are concerned that their children never ask any questions of a sexual nature. Children pick up subtle cues and have probably realised that the topic makes parents feel uncomfortable and therefore steer clear of it. It is important to make children feel good about their sexuality from the beginning. This will make it easier for them to ask questions about it throughout their lives. Here are a few good reasons why you need to take some time out and make sure that your child has the right kind of sexual information and how it can help your child.

PREGNANCY AND AIDS: Previously, the threat of unwanted pregnancies and STDs were the main reasons parents talked about sex. Many never did. Sex was made out to be something terrifying that could lead to scandal and disaster and social ostracism. Nowadays, the terrifying rise in HIV infections has added urgency to the need for proper sex education.

AN ONGOING PROCESS: Questions should be answered naturally and in age-appropriate fashion. A question on pregnancy from a five-year-old should be answered differently from when it is asked by a twelve-year-old.

BE A GOOD ROLE MODEL: Model the lessons you want to teach your children through your own behaviour, expectations and messages. Children learn more from what they see you doing than from what you say.

KNOW YOUR FACTS: Even if it means reading up, then do so. If asked a question you do not know, say that you are unsure and go and do some research.

GIVE FACTS: Children are not always able to distinguish between facts and beliefs. Do not let your personal belief system influence what you answer to a factual question. While there is room for imparting your values, this is not it.

ENCOURAGE YOUR CHILD: Curious children end up being better informed generally and self-confident children overcome peer pressure more easily. Praise is the best way to teach self-confidence.

LISTEN CAREFULLY: Guard against overkill. Answer what is asked, without going into unnecessary details and don’t jump to conclusions about your children’s sexual activities. Their questions may spring from something they heard on the playground, not because they are experimenting themselves.

POSITIVE FEELINGS: Young people who have positive feelings about sexuality are more likely to be able to protect themselves against STDs, unintended pregnancies and sexual abuse.

BE PATIENT: Sometimes some of your children’s questions could upset or embarrass you. Try not to criticise, lecture or nag. If you do, you won’t be asked questions again.

ASSURANCE: Let your children know that you are proud of them and that they are lovable. It will help to build their self-esteem. Also stress that it is normal for everyone to be different and that you do not find their questions strange in any way. A child is very vulnerable and can get carried away by external sources. Make sure you impart a proper understanding of sexuality in your child, and always be open to them and keep your child safe.

Public School Sex-Education Classes --- Bad News For Parents and Children

One of parents’ most important duties is to protect their children from harmful sexual values and behaviors. Yet many public schools force potentially harmful, sometimes shockingly explicit sex education on their students.

Most of the time, parents have no control over the content of these classes. Occasionally, a group of parents finds out about a particularly obnoxious sex education class and protests to the principal or local school board. The class may be dropped, only to be replaced by another class that teaches equally objectionable material.

School authorities’ cavalier attitude towards parents on this issue shows their anti-parent bias, and their contempt for parents’ rights to control the values their children are taught.

Many school authorities insist that children need comprehensive sex education from kindergarten through high school. They believe parents can't be trusted because they have shameful feelings about sex or have “outdated” moral or sexual values. School authorities, claiming that they know best regarding sex education, usurp the parents’ role, allegedly for the good of the children. In doing so, they show contempt for parents’ rights, values, and common sense.

Many sex-education classes indoctrinate children with sexual values that can cause them irreparable harm. For example, these classes often promote the idea that most sexual behaviors are acceptable, including adultery, homosexuality, masturbation, and premarital sex.

The sex-education instructor simply tells the kids to "be careful" or use their "common sense" when they engage in these behaviors. As if we can depend on teenagers with raging hormones to be careful or use their common sense. The soaring teen pregnancy rate in this country puts the lie to this notion.

Horror stories about sex education classes and flagrant violations of parents’ rights confront us from around the country. Here are only four of those stories:

• On March 19, 1996, a public school in East Stroudsburg, Pennsylvania made 59 sixth-grade girls submit to a genital examination as part of a routine physical. The school did not ask for parental consent. During the exam, school officials blocked the exit doors and refused to let the crying and pleading young girls call their parents.

• In Stephens County, Georgia, parents were shocked to discover that their fourteen- and fifteen-year-old daughters had been driven to a birth control clinic by a public school staff member without their knowledge. The county clinic administered AIDS tests and Pap smears to the girls and gave them birth control pills and condoms. The school denied parents access to the test results and defended its actions on the grounds that the counselor believed that she was doing what was best for the girls.

• The Pacific Justice Institute filed a lawsuit on behalf of parents against the Novato [California] Unified School District for authorizing pro‑homosexual presentations without any prior notice or consent. According to the Pacific Justice Institute Press Release, “The presentations entitled “Cootie Shots,” exposed elementary school children as young as seven years old with skits containing gay and lesbian overtures. The presentations were followed by question and answer sessions about what constitutes ‘normal’ families and acceptance of those who choose the homosexual lifestyle.” 6 (see Notes in "Public Schools, Public Menace")

• Carol (last name withheld for privacy), a schoolteacher, couldn’t believe what she was being asked to teach in her sex education class. The curriculum forced her to show second-graders pictures of nude boys and girls and ask them to name body parts. School authorities told Carol and her fellow elementary school teachers that there were no absolute moral rules, so she shouldn’t be concerned about what she had to teach the children.

Parents, it might be advisable if you periodically asked your children if their school is giving them sex-education classes and what the school is teaching in these classes.

If these classes force your children to sit through shocking, obnoxious, or embarrassing sex-education material, you can do something about it. Many states have Parent Notification laws that allow you to demand that the school "opt-out" (withdraw) your children from these classes. You can find more information about this important issue in "Public Schools, Public Menace."

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